What is Emotional Intelligence? A 3 Step Strategy!
Today we will look at the last of the Four Pillars of Health: Emotional intelligence. We will take an in-depth look at what it is by giving you practical tools and techniques to implement in your life right away. Instead of explaining what it is theoretically, we want you to first and foremost begin practicing it so you can feel it yourself.
Emotional intelligence means understanding your own emotions, other people’s emotions, and living in harmony with others. Emotional intelligence is closely connected to our inherent empathic nature and is directly connected to the heart’s intelligence. By consciously bringing the feelings and clarity of the heart into the forefront, you can begin to live in a way that is aligned with your spirit.
In today’s world, we can see that there is an ongoing separation from the intelligence of the heart in favor of the intellectual process of the mind. This is promoted to us from a young age by society as a whole, with technology playing a big part in creating a dynamic where the mind is perpetually speeding up. We can see this easily in the way the attention span and general restlessness are increasing.
The great news is that as soon as we are reminded that we can use emotional intelligence as a practice to return to a heartfelt way of living, we begin to yearn for it!
To activate and nurture the feeling intelligence of the heart, we first need to look at what is going on with our emotions. By bringing awareness to what emotions we harbor, we can begin to discern what is going on internally. Simply noticing what’s going on inside slowly but surely begins to clean and tidy up unnecessary thoughts and emotions.
Yes, the mind and thoughts also play a major role in this.
The mind has the power to bring either clarity of perception through mindfulness, meaning an empty mind. Or it can consist of whirly, foggy, repetitive thoughts that bring the problems of complexity instead of constructive simple solutions. We need to have a calm precise mind to be able to see what is going on at the emotional level.
This means that we have to take both emotions and mind when we are reuniting with the heart’s intelligence. Today we want to show you that emotional intelligence is mainly a practice of overcoming limiting and perhaps even negative emotions. To do this, we need to take a practical approach to whatever emotions are prevalent inside of us.
But enough talk! Let’s get practical!
Our Simple 3 Step Strategy To Deepen Your Emotional Intelligence
The main tool you have available to you is your awareness. By dedicating yourself to becoming aware of what is going on at the emotional level you will then have found the fertile ground where your emotional intelligence will be able to grow. This means in practice to use your inner eye for self-observation, instead of overthinking and talking to yourself.
In some ways, this can be likened to an active mindfulness exercise that you practice throughout your day.
The first awareness technique we recommend is to identify what your most common emotions are. What we want is to be composed of feelings of joy, creativity, empathy, motivation, and abundant vitality. This is what will come out of our inner work that begins with observing and discerning any negative or destabilizing emotions.
The most common negative emotions we need to look at are; fear, anger, sadness, and worry. Anytime you experience any of these emotions rising inside we want you to take the first decisive action step which is self-observation. Look at this emotion, feel this emotion, and watch your reaction to it.
This will drastically increase your awareness of what is going on internally and is the required first right action to take. You need to become aware of what emotions or a mix of emotions are happening inside of you. This practice is not as complicated as it sounds, you just have to get used to it.
The next thing is to look at what the emotions are comprised of. What we want you to notice is that three things are going on at the same time.
- You have an active vibration inside of your body. A feeling.
- There is also a process of the mind, interpreting what is happening. Most often this means thinking or self-talk about what is going on is taking place.
- There is a conscious awareness that is able to separate a single emotion into two separate observable processes. The one emotion becomes one feeling and one the mind process.
This three-step approach of internal observation is a strategy that will make it possible for you to not get caught up in unconscious emotions. Each emotion has its particular momentum and it is important for all of us to not get caught up in them. By applying your awareness as we suggest above you will bring conscious awareness into the emotion or situation instead of unconscious reactivity.
This is the foundation that we need to have to effectively deepen our emotional intelligence. We use our awareness in every moment to make sure we are not caught in the loop of negative emotions and the turbulence of the mind. When we do this we return to the intelligence of the heart. With this shift in attention, we will be more readily equipped to deal with stressful situations and unexpected challenges of life.
In the future, we will go deeper into emotional intelligence and look at how it relates to communication in all our relationships. What we love about this “new” outlook is that it brings us back to the uplifting and progressive feelings of the heart. This is intimately connected to holistic health, overall well-being, and spiritual path.
Here below we have two videos where we expand on this foundational practice. We hope you enjoy them! If you have any questions or feedback then please email us at [email protected]
If you are interested in holistic health coaching then we invite you to book a free consultation with us! In this 25 min session, we will give you our holistic perspective, what working together with us will make possible for you, and what a practical path forward on your health journey looks like.
//Sara & Simba